Yesterday.. I’m walking with a friend somewhere around the city (sabindo) … suddenly, I saw this really really beautiful girl and said “Subhanallah, cantiknya perempuan tu…” , then my friend said, “are you falling in love or attracted to her just because she’s pretty?” Well , I’m not falling in love at first sight ok… i’m just an ordinary guy who got attracted to a very beautiful girl, so that’s normal (and that prove that I’m not gay.. haha) ..  

But this question come to my mind, how can we know if we in a relationship because of love or is it because of lust?

 

Love and lust are inextricably intertwined. Lust is ground zero for hormones — it’s nature’s way of bringing the opposite sexes together to mate. In fact, without lust, it’s doubtful that love between a man and a woman would have a chance to prosper at all.

While love is the most ennobling of human emotions — transcendental, exalted and capable of engendering emotional states, which can make the male of the species “want to be a better man??”

 Lust — like love — is truly blind. This is why, especially at the beginning of a relationship, it can be hard to tell whether you’re in lust or love; whether she may be “The One,” or merely a passing fancy who’ll have your blood boiling for only a short while.

Lust is especially dangerous because it causes a man to think with his crotch and throw all reason and logic to the wind. When a man’s in lust he doesn’t care if he and his partner have anything in common. He’s not interested in where she comes from or where she’s going. His brain is only focused on using his key to unlock the door to the secret cave. If his partner’s only in lust, she’ll use this against him; but if they’re both falling in love, this sexuality is a bond.

 

I spend hours just thinking about this and this is my conclusion (correct me if I’m wrong) :  

 

To me,It’s lust if:

You’re totally focused on her looks and body (Mariah song - Touch my body.. lol)
Even before you know her name, you’re already attracted to her and fantasizing about what it would be like to have sex with her.

You don’t care about anything she has to say (you didn’t even care if she’s an idiot.. haha)
You don’t pay attention about anything she said cause all you want is to be with her. And touch all over her body and show her to your friends.

You only want to be with her to have sex (sex..sex..sex..)
You make excuses not to spend time with her, except for sex. And if she asks you for a favor, you tell her you’re too busy. But if you have to be with her and not have sex, she gets on your nerves.

 

 

And It’s love if :

You have great chemistry
You get lost in your conversations, chatting on phone or internet blab la bla all day long… and the hours pass like minutes. You’re more than willing to listen to her when she talks about her day. The chemistry between you is remarkable.

You always take her side
If someone says anything even slightly disparaging about her, you immediately rise to her defense. Furthermore, in anything, you always agree with her even if you disagree behind closed doors.

You find her beautiful (even she looks hideous)
Even if you catch her with no makeup on or just woke up with her hair so messy, she still looks beautiful to you.

 

You want to spend time with her
All you want to do is to be with her everyday and every minute as long as you can even she won’t let you touch her.

You include her in all your plans
whether you’re going out with your male friends or went to work, you want her there with you. And if she’s not there, you sneak off to give her a quick “I miss you” phone call. Of course, you don’t tell your buddies or anyone else.

You are more romantic
All of a sudden you find yourself listening to cheesy romantic songs and thinking of her. You send her sms everyday with beautiful word, send flowers and love notes to her.

 You see a future together
you experience the strange feeling that your life would be totally empty without her. You tell your friends and family that she may be The One, and you’re even thinking about marrying her.

 

 

You introduce her to your family
It becomes very important to you that your parents and everyone close to you to like her.
She makes you want to be a better man
she motivates you, makes you happy and you’ll do anything to make her happy.

 

There is a phrase I heard over the passed years that said, Men fight wars over lust, but they make homes and families for love.

Haha.. Maybe you’re now questioning, ‘Am I really in love with them, or is it just lust?’  You got the answer for yourself and you should be able to tell the difference. The real trick is in deciding what you want, and that’s up to you.